Archive for the ‘Thoughts’ Category

Thanks, October 29th

Wednesday, October 29th, 2014

Today, I’m thankful that every new day is a new canvas, a new opportunity, a new chance…

Even when I feel beaten down, I know it’s just today. I know that tomorrow starts fresh.

If I’m to be honest, I’d say that right now I feel trapped. I feel like I just can’t win.

But tomorrow is only a day away, as Annie says.

Thanks, October 27th

Monday, October 27th, 2014

Today, I’m thankful that my job forces me to be introspective at times. Sitting in on treatment groups, topics and discussions will often make me look at my own issues.

Thanks, September 23rd

Tuesday, September 23rd, 2014

Today, I’m thankful for tests and trials. They suck to go through but they make us who we are. I’m thankful that we don’t have to go it alone. I struggle more with worry than I have ever before, but I’m thankful for people I can lean on when worry strikes. Mortality is real. The weights of this world are real. But so is God, so is Love, so is Family, so are Friends.

Thanks, August 29th

Friday, August 29th, 2014

Today, I’m thankful that the Summer is ending and that we are entering a new season. With each new season comes a rebirth, a chance to move into a new season of life, a new opportunity. This Fall won’t be easier than the Summer or the Spring before it, but it’s a reminder that I again have a chance to work on the things I want to change about my life, my health, myself…

Today, I look forward to continuing to strengthen the things in my life that I love about life while decrease yet energy I focus into the wrong things. Today, I again thank God for my present and my future… and a chance to keep shaping that present and future.

Thanks, August 3rd

Sunday, August 3rd, 2014

Today, I’m thankful that my family, my faith, and my life have taught me not to judge people on the color of their skin, where they were born, their religious beliefs, or their sexual preference. I’m thankful that hurtful words offend me even when hearing people utter them ruins my day.

Thanks, July 24th

Thursday, July 24th, 2014

Today, I’m thankful that I’ve still got more than half of my vacation left… and that I got almost nine hours of sleep.

It has been a nice week thus far!

Thanks, July 20th

Sunday, July 20th, 2014

Today, I am thankful for my youngest son, Weston Max. Like I’ve said the last few days, my family is what keeps me going… and West is no exception.

West is a ball of energy, stubborn as can be. He’s always challenging but it’s not because he’s naughty, it’s because he’s unique. He loves his big brother and very obviously looks up to him already, but that doesn’t mean he’s just like his brother. He’s vastly different.

Cash is super verbal and Weston communicates much differently than Cash. While his vocabulary and speech are just starting to blossom, he’s always been strongest at communicating through his touch and his emotion. He also figures out how to do things with his hands much quicker than I remember Cash ever doing. For instance, he opened doors before he could really even reach them, while Cash didn’t really understand doorknobs until 3 or 4 years old.

Weston’s stubbornness and 90 mph speed at all times will wear out even a supernanny, but he makes it all worth it with his smile and his simple utterance of “I love you so much”. He insists on singing a prayer song before bed every day and often continues to pray for everyone in the family 3-4 extra times so that he doesn’t have to go to sleep yet. When he gets excited, he is literally the cutest thing on Earth.

I couldn’t imagine life with him… or Cash… or Brooke.

Today, I’m thankful for West. Today, I’m thankful that I have an amazing family to care for and grow with.

Thanks, July 19th

Saturday, July 19th, 2014

Today, I’m thankful for my Cashman. I’m ridiculously thankful for both of my sons, but today I’d like to focus on my eldest, Cash Hendrix. He is 5 and a half, starts kindergarten in the Fall, and is a very smart and interesting little dude. Like all children, he has he naughty moments, can be defiant, and is certainly no angel. But there are moments where he just makes my heart melt with little comments and questions that are wise beyond his short years. He gets so excited about small things, like falling asleep in bed with me, taking a 5 minute dip in the hot tub once his brother is asleep, and having his momma snuggle up in his bed for a few minutes when she gets home late from derby practice. And, despite brotherly fights and arguing, I catch him doing big brother things like sharing a toy, getting his little brother a drink from the kitchen, or trying to calm his little brother when upset. I love and cherish my little man… my little man who is growing up too fast.

Lately, I’ve been singing this song in my head a bunch. It’s from my high school years by a Christian punk band that I booked for a show when I was 15. The drummer, Russ, wrote it for his first son. I just wanted to share. I think it pretty much sums up how I feel when it comes to both of my boys.

I’m already sorry for all of the harm that is to come
I’m already thankful for the man I know that you’ll become
So, look up and laugh, we’ll cross that finish line together
Sleep tight tonight child and I will be watching over you
Rest assured God will be watching over you

All you need to learn, I’ll keep you safe from harm
I’d do all it takes
I’d lay down my life as long as I know you’ll be all right
I give you all my victories ’cause without you I’m not quite me
Rest assured I said I’d never leave

Thanks, July 16th

Wednesday, July 16th, 2014

Today I’m thankful for a specific family member. I mentioned earlier about my frustration that someone I care about just found out they are sick. Her grace and approach upon hearing this seemingly troubling info is astounding. I wish I could face my trials and struggles with a grace like hers, one that says, “Why worry? Just keep moving forward one day at a time!”

Frustrated

Wednesday, July 16th, 2014

I know I’ve been working on keeping a positive outlook and that this post may feels counterproductive to that, but I wake up today feeling frustrated. In the past year, I’ve seen people I care about pass away, get sick, and go through struggles that I wouldn’t wish on my enemies. Last night, someone else that I hold dear got tough news about a trial they shouldn’t be forced to face but now must.

I woke up wanting to believe that it was all a bad dream, a hellish nightmare. It’s not fair that this person should be forced to go through illness and treatment at this age. It’s not fair that this person must now fear if they will make it through the treatments alive and well. But it’s reality and it’s not just a nightmare.

I hope that this person can take solace in that they will not go it alone. I hope that this person knows that family and friends are hear to help. I hope that this person know that I care. I hope that this person knows how much I’ll be thinking and praying. I hope this person comes out the other side stronger for having faced this struggle. But most of all, I know that this person doesn’t deserve this and I hate that they have to deal with this. I love this person and I hope they know that they can lean on me, on us.

Please keep this person that I hold dear to my heart in your thoughts and prayers.